Let me just say that chapter 3 described my life--in more than one context.
I was reading the part in which Urciuoli describes Lena and her perception of the women who appear to "forget" English and switch to speaking Spanish. Lena disagrees with their excuse that they are "Spanish people" and asserts that they are just pretending to be forgetting English. The women, on the other hand, claim that they easily forget that Lena cannot speak Spanish so it is sometimes easier for them to switch to their native tongue. But they also point out that they are not talking about Lena in any way.
Here's where I can relate. I was actually having coffee with my neighbor the other day and he is from Puerto Rico. His friend (also from Puerto Rico) saw us sitting outside and decided to join us. We talked about a number of things but all of a sudden they started speaking in Spanish completely. I don't really know that much Spanish so I was really just sitting there waiting for them to finish. From time to time my neighbor would stop and tell me what they were talking about--they were discussing an ongoing strike in Puerto Rico. I knew for a fact that that's what they were talking about because I heard the word "huelga" throughout their conversation many times and I know that it means "strike".
But if I didn't know any Spanish at all, would I have felt uncomfortable like Lena? Would I think that they were talking about me and would I feel uneasy and uncomfortable? I felt uncomfortable because I felt casted out, I couldn't jump in the conversation and they know I'm not fluent to hold a coherent conversation for more than 30 seconds, but I didn't feel threatened in any way, is my point.
Lena believes that the excuse "we're Spanish people" doesn't warrant their "forgetting". But is it because they truly forget? Or is it simply because it is easier to communicate and explain things better in Spanish?
I know that Danny and Carlos didn't forget, because they clearly know I cannot speak Spanish and my understanding of their conversation when they are speaking at 50miles an hour is minimal to say the least. But they do it anyway because they have a better control over their ability to communicate to one another and explain things in more precise terms.
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This is actually a very common occurrence in my home. My mother often speaks in Korean, especially with her friends who are also Korean. However, my stepdad is white and knows minimal Korean. He often gets frustrated that their conversations begin in English (an attempt to include him), but, often, midway through it switches to Korean (which inadvertently excludes him). My mom and her friends always explain that they are not trying to exclude him, but that it is simply easier to communicate in their native language. I definitely agree with the point that it is not a matter of forgetting English; rather, it is the fact that communication can be conducted with a lot more ease when they can use their native language.
ReplyDeleteThis actually makes me think of a funny story as well. I have a little sister who is 6; she has been taught and spoken to in both English and Korean since she was a baby. I remember one particular instance when my mom was speaking to someone on the phone and my sister wanted some milk. She kept saying, “Mom, milk!” However, my mom did not respond to her request. Consequently, my sister, even as a two-year old, changed her request for milk from English to Korean. My entire family finds the interaction hilarious. It is amazing how people (of all ages) view bilingualism as a means to communicate. The fact that a two-year-old thought that the switching of languages would enable her to better communicate is very telling.
I have also experienced this! My friend, Mariana, is from Mexico and when I am with their family they speak in what I like to jokingly call "Spanglish." They are all completely fluent in both languages, and it is so funny to listen to them talk because they literally switch languages mid sentence and will do this several times in a matter of minutes. I can speak some Spanish, and because they switch languages I can generally get the gist of what they are saying. I know her mom often switches because she gets flustered on words, but Mariana has told me she honestly doesnt know she does it sometimes. Sometimes, it depends on what language she is thinking in (she is awesome and knows three fluently, along with bits and pieces of others.)
ReplyDeleteI think it is funny, but probably only because I know them so well and they will sometimes say something to me in spanish because they forget and then laugh and say "oh sorry! english!" and explain everything. But, I can see how it would be uncomfortable if they were not explaining everything simply because I would almost feel unwanted or that they were trying to be rude. I think its just a matter of the first word that comes to mind first. I often would love to have more than one way to say things!
It is interesting this topic actually came up in my social psychology class. We are talking about the self and how we perceive ourselves. We talked about seeing ourselves as we think other see us not as our self or as people actually see us but rather a mixture of the two we see what we think is what the other person thinks of us. This is reflected appraisal. Therefore, if people are talking in another language around us we are conscious and jump to the conclusion that they are talking about us because they had to use a different language to mask what they really think about us.
ReplyDeleteAlthough this is often not the case I have actually had an experience where it was. In high school during swim season I was unable to shave my legs (long story). Anyway, I went to get my nails done at a salon in the mall. Most of the women who worked in the salon were or asian descent and they were talking amongst themselves in their own language. Well for most guys who don't get their nails done when you get a pedicure, which is your toes, they sometimes massage your legs. Well me and my friend sat next to each other and when the women started massaging my legs she stated talking to the women doing my friends nails and laughing. I learned after she was done with my nails that she was talking about me, even though I had an ideas she was, from the man that checked me out. He even asked if is was a new trend not to share your legs. I then had to explain it was for swimming. So it is not always the case that you are paranoid.